InsaneJournal

so, my first bigbang ever completed is for polygamy. does this surprise anyone? no.

Title: Who Says Socks Have to Come in Pairs?
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: James/Lily/Sirius/Remus/Peter and any combination within the group.
Rating: NC17
Wordcount: 15 498
Warnings: het, slash, some bad sex, as some characters are more in tune with each other than others. mild drug use. prior to fic infidelity.
Summary: Who knew that James Potter was so full of brilliant ideas? For two weeks in December the Marauders and Lily attempt to redefine their relationships.
Author's Notes: I had it set in 77, and the moon phase was fine. Then the beta pointed out it wasn't enough time for the characters to get themselves in the mess they're in. So I switched to 78, and only realised a day before this was due that the moon would now be on the 14th instead of the 25th, which completely messes up what plot there is. So it's still in 78, but with a 77 moon. Sorry.

eta: fanmix! by soda_and_capes...here: http://soda-and-capes.livejournal.com/335052.html#cutid1


How Things Ended
When James slams his drink to the table, Sirius knows it's a bad sign. He knows everything about his best mates. He can read their body language like a book. To an outside observer James slamming things around might be viewed as either destruction or enthusiasm. But they cannot comprehend the text that is James Potter, and they would fail any essay they had to write on him.

No, James slamming objects around means he's trying to work up his courage. Sometimes it's good; Intermediate Transfigurations tossed to the floor just before James changed his mind about trying out for the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Sometimes it's bad, Advanced Potion Making tossed onto the couch before James kissed Alice so they could make Lily and Frank jealous. Sometimes it's noble; a hand-blown glass unicorn shattering against the wall as James shouted at his parents that if Sirius couldn't stay, he'd be leaving. Sometimes it's stupid, uncountable bodychecks before each prank is executed.

Whatever it is, Sirius is with him - and more importantly, with him with enthusiasm. Ten years and a handful more summers of being stuck in a house that leached away happiness with parents that frowned on all excitement, Sirius knows the importance of enthusiasm. So even if he doesn't like James' plan, whatever it might be, he's always 100% behind him.

Still, James is drunk, and while Sirius is willing to get into a brawl to protect James' courageous picking a fight, he hopes that's not actually the master plan.

"Follow me!" he says without a slur, which is a good sign in Sirius' book. James stands with hardly a wobble, and Sirius follows suit. He raises his stein to his lips and chugs the last bit of his beer before walking after James. After all, there's no sense in wasting. Remus and Peter are close behind him, Peter leaning slightly on Remus. Wormtail enjoys other intoxicants so alcohol has more of an effect on him than the rest of the Marauders.

James leaves through the Floo first, calling out his and Lily's address. Peter says "Well, thank Merlin for that," and Sirius isn't sure whether he means because James brilliant idea doesn't involve goading the burly patrons of the bar, or because James is using a Floo, not walking out in the knee high snow drifts. Either way, Sirius agrees.

Sirius places his boots on the mantel of the fireplace and only spends a moment hoping they won't drip too badly before moving out of the way so Remus and Peter can come through. They repeat the gesture and collapse on various pieces of living room furniture. Sirius chooses the armchair nearest the fireplace - it's covered in Padfoot's hair and no amount of cleaning charms can get every strand.

Sirius gulps when Lily comes into the room. It is clear James has woken her from a sound sleep, her hair is pulled back into a ponytail but pieces have escaped, and she's wearing a pink terrycloth dressing gown and slippers.

"What did you do?" she sighs, eyes still mostly closed.

"What did you do?" Peter hisses at James. He's got an irrational fear of upsetting women, from what Sirius has garnered Wormtail's mum and sister were as mental as his own, but Peter isn't good at dealing with crazy bints.

"I didn't do anything!" Lily misunderstands, which is understandable considering she can't see the object of Peter's glare. "James woke me up, told me we had something important to discuss as a group. I thought it might be a mission, but then James' breath smells like beer, so I decided one of you has done something dumb."

"We have no idea what he's on about. We just followed him out of the pub." Sirius loves how comfortable Remus feels in James and Lily's house, though it always depresses him when they go back home and Remus acts like he's out of place. He wishes Remus would flop back on the couch in their house, head in the middle cushion with his feet on the armrest, the way he does here.

"We've all done something dumb!" James states emphatically, arm around Lily's waist.

"Enlighten us," Peter mutters.

"We've all lied, repeatedly." Sirius has a bad feeling. A really bad feeling. A quick glance around the room shows everyone but James is nervous. He thinks if everyone is lying, there's probably a good reason for it. Thinks but doesn't say, he doesn't want to force himself into the spotlight.

"It's stupid really. We're all friends, we should just be honest. I'll go-"

"If we're not telling each other something, there's probably a good reason." Remus offers. Sirius beams at him, though he's staring straight at the ceiling and probably can't see. Brilliant boyfriends think alike.

"There are even better reasons to tell." James is smiling, but he bumps his hip against Lily's, and it's clear he's reaching for courage again. "We've all been cheating. We're supposed to be two couples and a single man, but I'm willing to bet everyone in this room has had sex with everyone in this room."

Sirius, who most certainly hasn't had sex with Peter or Lily takes another look around the room. Remus is looking straight at the ceiling, but his toes are curled. Peter's arms are crossed, and Lily is blushing. All of his friends are slags. He never would have guessed.

"And what would you have us do about it?" Remus asks, his voice cold. "You think we'd all be better off if we fought about it, and avoided each other?"

This is a sodding nightmare. A bloody fucking nightmare, and his wand hand is twitching with the urge to Obliviate everyone in the room. Sirius doesn't want Lily to divorce James over their occasional dalliance. He doesn't want Remus' heart to be broken because they love each other, but James is James and things sometimes happen.

"Don't be ridiculous! Not only should we not stop being friends, we should continue our various relationships. We should just be honest about it."

"What are you suggesting? An orgy?" Peter should be laughing at the idea, he laughs at most things, but he's not and it worries Sirius.

"I don't see why not. We all love each other, why can't we just be honest about it?" A belch takes away from the seriousness of James' statement.

"I haven't had sex with Sirius." Lily says, startling everyone except Remus, who still hasn't moved. Sirius could believe he was dead, if not for the talking and the slow movement of his chest with each cool breath.

"Nor have I, actually." Contrary to Remus' shutting down, Sirius is speeding up, and at Peter's statement he begins to hyperventilate.

"Well, then that's it!" Lily is shaking, Remus is still, Peter is moments from bailing, Sirius is rocking back and forth in the dander covered chair and James is smiling. Sirius kind of wants to murder him.

"What's what? I need a smoke." Peter pats down his pockets, but he can only find a lighter, no joints, and for that Sirius is absurdly grateful. Lily and James have a no smoking in the house rule, and if Peter goes outside Sirius is sure he won't be coming back. He'll just disappear forever, because Peter is a rat, and they're good at hiding.

"We all have holidays coming, except for Remus because he doesn't work. So we'll try, just for those two weeks, to have a relationship with each other. No lying, just friendship and shagging. You three'll move in, and we'll see if we can make it work."

"Don't you think you ought to involve your wife on that decision?" Remus' voice is so cold it makes Sirius want to cry. He knows it's Remus' way of preparing himself to live without his mates, detach his emotions, and Sirius can't stand it. It was bad enough after Snape, and it's even worse now.

"My wife has slept with two of my best friends, and probably plans to do so again. I've slept with all my friends, and I definitely plan to do it again. So why do we have to lie about it? It doesn't make sense."

Sirius has hope, but it's a lie. Even if everyone else agrees, Remus won't. Remus has already recompiled himself after his brief mental breakdown at being outed, and his mind already has constructed walls to prevent him from being weak again.

"While I'm still in desperate need of a smoke, I agree. I hate the sneaking around. I want to be with you all, and I don't want to lie about it."

Lily breaks away from James and for a moment Sirius shatters. He wonders what in the pub made James snap, and how any of them will ever survive without each other's friendship. This is the night that everything good dies, and Sirius knows he's not good, but he wants to die too.

But Lily kneels beside the couch and grabs one of Remus' large hands with both of her own. "Remus, please. This isn't about Sirius not wanting you, this is about everyone wanting everyone. I know you want to be wanted. And it's not because you're a werewolf, it's because you're human. I want to be wanted, Peter wants to be wanted, James and Sirius want to be wanted, even if they never show any vulnerability." And that shows how poorly he and Lily know each other, because Sirius sometimes feels like his entire life is based upon trying to hide his obvious vulnerabilities. "You've already had sex with me and James and Sirius, what's so different about being honest about it?"

Merlin bless her soul, it works. His vision is skewed from the rocking back and forth, but Sirius can still see the tension leave Remus. He can see the accordance long before it's verbal.

"How about it, Sirius?" James is sombre in a way they normally aren't with each other.

"Of course!" he wheezes, still hyperventilating, though it's getting better.

"So it's settled then. We're all spending our two weeks here, and we'll work it out or figure out how to handle it not working. Until then I'm going for a nap." James walks out of the room and Sirius is torn between loving him for finally getting it out into the open, and hating him for being so casual about something that can still end terribly. He settles for numb, and walks over to Remus, where Lily is still kneeling.

"Shall we go home now?"

"Right."

Twelve
When Remus comes in with his small duffle, he sees he's the last person to enter Waverly Place. It makes sense that Peter and Sirius have entered before him, they're not used to having days off. Instead of waking up and going to work, they woke up and went to Waverly Place. Remus, who know how to use the non-schedule of the unemployed to his benefit went to the library for several hours before getting a light lunch of roasted chestnuts before coming here.

"So, do we just start an orgy now?" It's the question on everyone's mind, Remus is just surprised Lily said it not Sirius.

"Would you fuck on a first date between two people?" Honestly, yes. But Remus reckons James is trying to make this more than awkward group sex. "We should get to know each other."

"I'm pretty sure we all know each other." Peter's grin means he's baked, but Remus doesn't care. It's taken him from a nervous constantly twitching boy to a more casual man, and that Remus can only approve of.

"Shut it, Wormtail. I've got an idea." Remus barely stops his hand from racing to his face to pinch the bridge of his nose. James' ideas aren't always the best, though Sirius treats each like gold dripping from his lips. "Everybody give me your left sock."

Remus rolls his eyes but takes the worn grey sock off and gives it to James. Soon he's got a handful, his and Peter's are both knitted, Sirius' novelty with stripes of black and white morphing into their opposite colour, Lily's novelty sock with little cherries that actually smell like cherries.

With his other hand James waves his wand and the rubbish bin comes from the bathroom. He tips the used tissues impatiently onto the carpet and puts the socks in the bin, completely ignoring Lily's glare. "So, every day we'll draw out who's going on a date that day. They'll sleep in the master bedroom, the rest of us will kip in the spare bedroom. They'll have sex if they want, I reckon most will want. The rest of us are stuck with wanking, no falling back into old habits." James is smirking, and for the first time Remus doesn't feel guilty for wanting to snog the expression away.

"I'll only play if you pick up the rubbish," Lily says, and it's such a mundane thing in such a strange situation that everyone laughs. Remus feels better for it, because it means that no matter what happens this next week, their personalities will come out intact. He might lose everything else, but he won't lose himself in this.

Peter Accios the kitchen bag and hovers it beside James. "I'd hurry if I were you. I think it's leaking." Sure enough, there is something dripping from the corner onto the carpet, not that Remus wants to speculate what it is. James picks up the tissues then Peter takes the bag back as Sirius mutters a cleaning charm to clean the carpet. It occurs to Remus that they've already got the domestic part of the relationship down.

James raises his shirt collar over his head and reaches into the bin. It's not a foolproof plan, surely the socks must feel different, but Remus decides not to bicker. It's not like he can think of a better way to do it. Out of the bin comes a sock with cherries, and a sock with a hole in the toe.

As James pulls his shirt back down Lily complains "We've already wasted half the day!"

"Well, it's your fault you have a partner that can't show up on time."

"There was no specified time!" Remus protests but James continues to argue haughtily with Lily (who suggests they start tomorrow) and he's not heard.

It cuts to the heart of it, the first day's pairing putting two members of the original relationships together. Of course, it could be worse. If the first pairing had been Lily and Sirius, his boyfriend might have bailed. Sirius has never had sex with a woman in his life, and that's the random draw day he's most worried about.

"Well, come on then," Lily jostles Remus out of his worries. She beckons as she walks backwards towards the master bedroom, and Remus guesses James won the argument. Not by intelligent points, just by sheer abrasiveness. He's a lot like Sirius, while he and Peter and Lily are more willing to let things go.

Remus is nervous, as if he hasn't had sex with Lily before. He closes the door and draws the curtains, then begins to unbutton his shirt with shaking hands. Her t-shirt comes off far more easily, showing a lacy but well worn pink bra. Pretty but practical, that's Lily. He takes a step closer, longer arms curling around her to undo it, and try as he might he can't quite get the hooks.

"Stop." It's a command, and Remus wants to cry. If his fumbling has turned Lily off, then he's singlehandedly ruined everything. His hands fall to his side and he talks a step back.

"Look, it's obvious you're not comfortable. So there's no point in doing this if you aren't. Even if you get hard, you're not going to be enjoying yourself, it'll be like a chore. I don't want that, I'm sure you don't want that. Go get your records."

Remus leaves the master bedroom and is mildly surprised that James and Sirius aren't pressed to the door nearest the bed, trying to hear everything. Instead Sirius and Peter are playing a game of chess and James is idly catching and releasing his snitch.

He's brought an entire milk crate with him, but it's easy to pick out the album that has the most comfort in it. "What's this?" Lily asks as he slides the black circle out of it's sheath. He's not entirely sure how it can play in a wizard household, only that Peter rigged something for all three houses. It's a lifesaver, it's awkward enough living in a house that Sirius owns and refuses to let him help pay for without having music to sooth him.

"The first album my dad ever played for me. It's their first album, I was ten when I heard it."

"That's pretty old for a first song."

As the guitar starts Remus flops back onto the bed, feet pressed against the headboard. Lily joins him, tangling a hand in his chest hair. Remus moves his fists with the slow drumbeat, enjoying as it speeds up about two minutes in.

"Can we not go there? It's not that I won't tell you sometime, it's just talking about it isn't going to make me more comfortable."

"Sure." She, better than Sirius, knows how to leave things alone. At five minutes it picks up and Remus bangs his head along with it hard enough that the bed starts squeaking.

They just listen through Black Sabbath and The Wizard, though at the end Lily giggles and asks Remus if he thinks the singer's met Albus. It's when Behind The Wall of Sleep starts that Remus rolls onto his side and starts to design a trail of hickeys on Lily's neck. She tastes so sweet, so female, and the best part is the utter lack of stubble.

It's a hissing near silence by the time Remus pulls away, Lily's neck already red and darkening. Realising he won't have to heal the marks away sends a spark of excitement through him, and it's with a heavy erection straining against his trousers that he gets up to flip the album over.

To the sounds of Evil Woman he unbuckles his belt and lets his trousers drop to the floor. Remus can't help but sigh when his cock is free of its restraints, and Lily giggles but it doesn't bother him. He crawls onto the bed and pushes up her skirt. He starts biting and sucking at her thighs, slowly making his way towards her cunt.

She's already wet when Remus licks at her, her hands in his hair guiding his mouth to her clit. Remus wants to laugh right into her inner folds, less than twelve hours ago when he'd woken Sirius up his boyfriend had guided his head in the same way. There must just be something tuggable about his hair.

Her knees are crushing her head as she whimpers, hardly loud enough to hear over Sleeping Village. "Stop, stop," she moans, but Remus doesn't stop, won't until he wrings a second orgasm from her. "Stop, fuck me, stop."

Stop is not in Remus' vocabulary.

Eleven
Sirius always sleeps in when he isn't prodded by Remus, informing him he's going to be late for work. So when he finally does slowly drift up into consciousness, he's not surprised to see the sun streaming in though the poorly angled blinds. It's a poor guest room that allows for blinds, in Sirius' opinion. Blinds are the devil, letting in light at four thirty when one is trying to get to sleep after a fun night. Chirping birds are lesser demons.

He estimates it's around noon which isn't too late as far as it goes. Sirius gives a quick glance at the other twin, but James is already up. He pulls on pyjama bottoms and a t-shirt and leaves the guest room without bothering to make the bed. The concept has never made sense to him, why would you waste time cleaning something that was going to get messy every single night?

Remus is eating a grilled cheese sandwich, chair tilted back slightly so his calves are resting on the table, plate balanced carefully on his groin. His smile of good morning is cheddar orange.

"Did you make that? Make me one?"

"Peter made it, and he made for James and Lily too. He made an entire batch at lunch, which you missed as you were sleeping. Grab a bowl of cereal, and wake up next time." Remus is too cheery, so Sirius darts over and takes the bottom of Remus' sandwich. Ignoring his protests he takes a defiant bite. It's delicious, the cheese is sharp and almost spicy.

The master bedroom has two sets of double French doors, a set on either side of the large fireplace. It must make it obvious to Lily when James stumbles in from being with one of the Marauders. Or maybe it's the other way around, James being woken up by Lily walking out of the fire then going directly for a shower.

One of the doors has two socks on it with a sticking charm. The cool colour changing sock is his, he can't tell until he crosses the room and observes the slight difference of James' black wool socks and Peter's navy that he and Peter are going to 'date' today. And honestly, the idea seems a little ridiculous to him. Pete's cool, but you can't make yourself want to fuck a bloke that you're not attracted to. But it's James' idea, so he has to back it up. And if it works, then everything will be so much better.

"So, where'd you like to go?" he asks Peter casually.

"We have to go somewhere? Lily and Remus didn't."

"Where is Lily, anyway? And what did you have in mind if we're not going?"

"I think she's seeing Alice and Frank. And James got an owl to meet Dumbledore, but he said he won't take very long." Remus explains, mouth still full.

"You wanna go for a smoke?"

One social call, one call to war. Not bad, for a Thursday morning. As for Peter's suggestion, it's not often any of them join him in his intoxication. But Sirius isn't against the idea completely, so he takes his boots off the mantel and tosses Peter's at him.

The back porch is clean of snow, though the grass is covered. James sweeps it off every time it snows, and whilst the wood is cold through his pyjamas it's not wet. Peter opens a glasses case on his knee and digs through the various paraphernalia to find what he wants. He chooses a long and thin pipe, black metal, and balances it on his other knee whilst his hands pull apart the nugget and put the smaller pieces in the pipe. "It'll burn better," he explains, though Sirius hasn't asked.

Peter lights it and takes his hoot, then passes it to Sirius. It tastes full, which is a ridiculous adjective and yet it's true. His large exhale makes his head tingle, and he wonders if it's really coming on so quickly, or if he's only psyched himself out. Peter takes a second hit, and this time when Sirius inhales he gets a brilliant idea. Before he can exhale he presses his lips directly onto Peter's, and then opens his mouth. Smoke comes out their nostrils as their tongues slide against each other.

Sirius doesn't notice Peter working at his drawstring until his bottoms have slid down and his lower back is exposed to the December air. Peter easily slips his hand between fabric and skin, but the wind is making Sirius get gooseflesh.

He breaks away from Peter's delicious lips to ask "Can we do this part inside?" Peter stands and they open the backdoor. Remus is still in the kitchen, still lounging with his legs up. The only difference is the book he's reading instead of eating a sandwich. He looks up at the creaking of the door, and Sirius wonders if they look as debauched as he feels. Peter's grinning, like he always does when he's stoned, and his hair is mussed from Sirius' fingers. As for Sirius, he's sure he's blushing, and he hasn't bothered to retie his bottoms, just holds a crumple of fabric on his left hip, trying to ignore that the fabric is slumping diagonally and the hair of his groin is probably showing.

"We're going to go use the master," Peter explains, and Sirius can't help the laugh that burbles out.

Sirius closes the French door behind him, but as he tries to draw the curtains they get stuck and he can't be arsed to figure them out. If Remus wants to watch, he doesn't mind. They strip and on the master bed and Peter's hand is back on his cock. He strokes Sirius' foreskin lightly with his thumb, and the movement sends shivers through his entire body. It's like he's still outside, naked in winter. When it recedes he keeps the same light touch on the head of his cock, and each whisper light stroke makes Sirius quiver all the harder until he his fingers grab Peter's extended arm harshly, and comes all over the bedspread.

Once he's stopped shaking Sirius pushes at Peter's intoxicant pliant body until he's resting on his back, legs still dangling off the bed. He takes Peter's bollocks in one hand and lowers his open mouth over Peter's cock. It's strange to be sucking someone that isn't Remus, James had wanted only fucking and Remus was the first bloke he was ever with. Peter fits differently in his mouth than Remus does, and behaves differently. Remus is usually good at holding still, but Peter's hips cant up each time Sirius' lips slide up, like Peter can't stand the idea of not being in Sirius' mouth.

He tastes different too, when he spills himself into Sirius' mouth. Sirius isn't sure if it's the pot accentuating things, or if it's just the truth that Peter's come is saltier than Remus'. It doesn't really matter, it's only manners to swallow it. Said out loud it might sound cruel, but in his head he can say that whilst Peter will never be his first choice, he's a pretty fun second.

Ten
It's strange to wake up in a room that doesn't have Sirius in it.

Remus didn't go home for Christmas seventh year, instead going with Sirius and Peter to James'. It was great fun, everyone in sleeping bags in the basement, room lit at night with the tree lights. James' dad had been a baker before retiring, so every day of the two weeks there had been piping hot bread and cake. Sure the floor was a bit uncomfortable, but trying to fit four bedrolls in a room slightly bigger then a bathtub had made for a bonding experience.

The day they left Hogwarts Remus moved into Sirius' home. It's never felt like anything but Sirius' home, even though Sirius tells him it's his as well. Remus can't see how it can be any part his, he doesn't pay for it, he doesn't have any furniture in it. It feels like he doesn't have to right to put his feet on the coffee table, and Remus puts his feet on everything.

All in all, it's been about sixteen months since he's woken up and not smiled at the way Sirius' hair moves with his breathing - he always falls asleep on his back, with his hair strewn about his face. But this morning Sirius is in the master with Peter, and he can't deny that it hurts a bit. Not nearly as much as he thought it would, when James forced the truth into the open he'd prepared to be completely wrecked, and it hadn't happened. It's not complete and utter devastation, it's more like when you want the double chocolate glazed doughnut but somebody's taken it and all that's left is the chocolate dip. Irritated, but aware that you can still get what you want in the future.

Like someone is reading his mind, when James dips his hand into the bin he shows those in the room the striped sock and the grey sock. James goes to stick them to the closed doors but Remus shakes his head. Peter's already up, cooking bacon for everyone, and Sirius is sleeping through their time. "I'll get him."

He doesn't bother to knock on the door, Sirius won't wake up anyway. He pulls off his bottoms so he's just in socks and t-shirt and cuddles against his warm boyfriend. Remus loves a hundred things about his boyfriend, but one of the qualities is how delightfully warm he gets while he's sleeping. Another is while James drools in his sleep, and Peter snores, Sirius manages to look regal, like he's the king of dreamland.

For a few minutes he just lets himself rest against Sirius. Then his brain gets the better of his body, and he wants to talk. Sirius is not generally an easy one to get up, and over the years Remus has learned direct methods are better. So he sits up and pokes his index finger right into Sirius' eye.

As always, it works. Sirius' eyes spring open as he looks in every direction for the nonexistent threat. He goes from sleeping lord to leaping into action, and Remus enjoys watching the transition. Ever since second year it's been his job to make sure Sirius gets his arse out of bed in time for classes. "Morning Moony. Why you in here?"

"It's our day, and I wanted to talk while you were still cuddly." Remus smiles, and in response Sirius rolls to his side and holds out his arm. Remus lies back down and presses his back against Sirius' heated stomach. His breathing quickly falls in rhythm with his boyfriends.

"So, talk..."

"You think it should bother me that I've turned into my mother?" Remus asks heavily.

"Well, since I'm not your father, everything should be alright." Sirius' breathing on his neck is making him hard, which is rather distracting from the depression he should be feeling at the thought of his parents fucked up life. It's what he hadn't told Lily, and doesn't know exactly how to broach the subject. How do you go about saying my mum cheated on my dad with this bloke Fenrir Greyback, and when my dad found out and confronted him, Fenrir didn't take kindly to it. He decided that since my dad's main argument was that it was disgusting to cheat on a parent, he'd make the child undesirable so my dad wouldn't care anymore. So my mum blamed my dad for what happened, and divorced him and wouldn't let me see him for four years without making it seem like you want sympathy?

"You think we're fucked up for all cheating on each other?"

"I think that James is right, and if we'd just been honest about it earlier we could have figured this out already."

"Sirius, don't just agree with James. Tell me what you think!" the most aggravating thing about his boyfriend is his willingness to do everything James says.

"I think that even if Peter or Lily aren't exactly my type, we have to remember the stakes."

Remus is distracted from pursuing the 'how was Peter' question by the mention of stakes. "What?"

Sirius tightens his arms around Remus, pulls him in closer. "You know I love you. But, as shitty as this makes me, you're not the only one I love. And I'm okay with that being the same with you and me and you and Lily. But we're the Marauders plus one now, you know that as well as I do, that we can't change that. Remus, either this works with all of us, or this works with none of us. And can you handle it if we don't have anyone? Because I can't. I need this group to work, because I can't stand the idea of James being stuck with only Lily, and you being stuck with only me, and Peter being alone."

It seems pretty fucking horrible to Remus too.

Nine
Everything in Peter's life opposes something else. Nearly every waking moment is trying to sort out what matters more, and has been as long as he can remember. It hurt sometimes, when James and Sirius and even the professors would treat him like he was slow. He isn't stupid, he's never been. He's merely preoccupied.

No wonder he smokes on an almost hourly basis. Marijuana seems to slow down time, it gives him more time to think. Even better, it appeals to his baser nature, making choices more obvious. Sober Peter worries about personal safety vs group loyalty, stoned Peter likes his friends.

Not that it's that cut and dry, of course. If it was just him, it would be easier to say to hell with safety. But he's got his parents to worry about too, the possibility that choosing the wrong side will get them murdered. The third good thing pot does it make it easy to distract himself, so he doesn't have to think about how deep in the mire he is.

He hears the door open, but doesn't bother to sit up. They must be used to his eccentricities by now, there's no point in trying to be ashamed of them. The person stands over him and attempts to look him in the eye. Even upside down he can tell it's Remus, sandy hair and eyes that make him look perpetually sad.

"You aren't cold? You've been out here awhile."

"The porch is dry, and the clouds are interesting. Would you like to partake?" Peter inches over as Remus lies down beside him.

"You've just been looking at clouds?" he asks after a few minutes of silence.

"It's more interesting when you're stoned. I'm sure it works when you're sober too. Can't you see any shapes?" Peter hears rather than sees Remus adjusting so he can better look, the wood creaks as he moves.

"I guess that one looks like a train." Peter grins, happy Remus is playing along. "What do you see?"

"Most of today's have been dancing ladies. I guess I'm in a dancing mood."

"Right." There's a silence that feels heavy to Peter before Remus adds "Do you want to go inside?"

"You and Sirius spent nearly the whole 24 hours snuggling. You sure you want to be with others?" It's not that Peter doesn't want to shag Remus, he's a fit bloke. And handsome, except for the scars, which is hardly his fault. Besides, he can hardly dislike Remus for being scarred when he's fat, it would be hypocritical or something. But as far as opposing needs go; get laid or make Remus feel comfortable, it's not much of an issue.

"Yeah. It's not going to work any other way, and it has to work someway."

"We could do the same, if you'd rather."

"What?"

"Snuggle. You don't have to fuck, if you don't want to. Not all couples fuck, I'm pretty sure my parents have stopped. Not that I've asked them of course. That would be a horrid conversation."

"We could just continue looking at the clouds?" Remus offers. And Peter's a bit disappointed, feels slightly unwanted. But as the sky continues to subtly change, Remus slips his hand into Peter's, and things become okay.

Eight
Each Marauder wakes up differently. Sirius is always last to wake, but immediately alert upon being woken. Remus is always the first awake, sometimes James wonders if he sleeps at all. Peter, no matter what time of day it is that he wakes is groggy for at least a half hour. And James knows that when he wakes he's a bit tetchy, though he thinks his friends and family's claims of worse then a Hungarian Horntail are an exaggeration.

Sirius and Lily are still in the guest room, but both Peter and Remus are out of the master. Remus is engrossed in some book, whilst Peter is pretending to read the Prophet. James can see right through him, the least because his eyes aren't actually open. He strides through the living room without bothering to say good morning and rifles through his dresser to get new clothes. He changes, door wide open. There's no point in faking modesty when everyone in the house has seen him naked.

He closes his eyes and sticks his hand in the bin of socks. The socks are Peter's and his, and it's about bloody time. It's been four days since he's had sex with someone, which is utterly ridiculous. He charms the socks to stick to the door and then walks over to the couch his mates are sitting on.

"Make me breakfast," he demands. Peter doesn't respond, so James lifts his leg and nudges Peter with his toes and repeats the request.

"Do I look like a maid?" Peter mumbles. But he stands, which surprises neither James nor Remus, who's watching the exchange over the top of his book. It's the way things always work.

The thing that makes Peter different from Sirius is that Peter worships his friends whilst Sirius loves his brothers.

James sits at the kitchen table and watches Peter pour flour and water and other stuff into a bowl. James knows enough to know he's making pancakes, but is rather awed by Peter's ability to pour and get the right amount of the ingredient without measuring. It must come from getting a NEWT in Potions.

As the circles of batter fry Peter gets the butter and sugar out for Remus, and the syrup for James. He sets the table without a word, but when he opens the fridge he says "we're out of milk."

James simply cannot have pancakes without milk. It's like going on a kitchen raid without getting apples, or going to Honeydukes and not getting chocolate. It's technically possible, but it's utterly unthinkable. "How can we be out of milk? Get milk!"

"Do I look like a cow? Can I milk myself?" James thinks that Peter is fat and has a bit of boob to milk, but knows better than to say it.

"We need to get milk. Come on, we're getting milk."

There's not much of a difference usually, between best mates and brothers, worship and love. Either way, it results in the bloke doing what James wants.

James apparates to the nearest wizard grocer. Peter is only a moment behind him, an inch or two from landing directly in the display of lettuce but there nonetheless. It only proves how often Peter is over making him a meal before a shag whilst Lily is out that Peter knows exactly what grocer James uses, and where the dairy section is.

They're in public, but it's their day, and he's James Potter and he can do what he want. So he presses Peter against the cool glass and snogs him, because it's what he wants. Peter's soft against him, trapped between the refrigerators and his torso, and James loves how contrasting he feels from Lily or Sirius. James puts his left hand against the door and the heat of it begins to fog the glass. His right hand is occupied with cupping Peter outside his trousers, aiming to get Wormtail as excited as he is.

Peter tilts his head to free his mouth. "James, we're in a store."

"So?"

"Do I look like a slag?" James doesn't respond. He doesn't need to, because when he recaptures Peter's lips Peter doesn't break away a second time. When James jerks his right hand up, Peter thrusts forward. When James meets Peter's thrust with his own, Peter's hands circle to rest on the curve of his arse.

Where the difference lies is in the attitude. They might both agree to do what he wants, but James can always sense when Sirius thinks it's a ridiculous idea, and it just doing it to support his brother. In Peter's case, it's immediate capitulation. Sometimes it seems like Peter doesn't have any of his own thoughts in his head, only suffers the whims of others patiently. It's only when he's smoking that he gains more of a personality, which is why James allows narcotics use without comment.

Peter is sober, so Peter is his, and James loves it. He loves it even more when Peter is stoned and still wants him, because then he knows it's truly what Peter wants. There's no better feeling in the world than being wanted.

Seven
He doesn't even know where they are, which is bad if they need to apparate away. It isn't strictly necessary, as long as you know where you want to go you should be alright. But for Remus, part of his thought process during apparition is always 'I am leaving here, and going there'. It won't be possible due to James side along apparating him, and he can only pray if something dreadful happens he doesn't splinch.

It's obvious Sirius has been here before, James doesn't need to pop back into the house to get him. It's equally obvious Peter and Lily knew what he was on about, as they'd refused to 'go to the trees'. Remus wonders when exactly he became the one to know the least about James. It's odd, considering they occasionally shag. Then again, he's learned that's not exactly an exclusive club.

He was naive enough - or maybe just nostalgic for Hogwarts - to follow James and Sirius without asking where they were going. Now that he's here, he's at least not dumb enough to follow their actions.

On the other hand, he's not ordering them not to, or going back home to Peter and Lily. And really, how fucking scary is it that he's already thinking of James and Lily's home as his own?

His two black haired friends are stripping down, never mind that it's the middle of winter. A week until Christmas, it must be twelve degrees, and they're both nude except for boxers. Sirius strides to the nearest tree and hangs their clothes over a branch to keep them from wicking the water from the snow, then strides back to Remus. "Come on now."

"No. No nudity in the winter for me, thanks."

"It's not just nudity!" James shouts, a bit of a distance from them both. He points his wand directly at his bare feet and shouts a breaking hex. Just like that he plunges into water Remus hadn't known was there. Remus shouts his name, heart in his throat, wondering frantically if this is Imperio, if they've somehow gotten to the Marauders. James is going to drown, and knowing that they're all targets and believing that something bad will happen to them are completely different things.

Remus doesn't know what to do first, try to rescue James, or check to see if Sirius has glazed over eyes too, or go back to the house and make sure Lily and Peter are safe, or try to contact other members of the Order or- his thoughts are spiralling, and whoever thought he'd make a good soldier for the resistance was insane, because he can't even make a simple decision as the second are ticking away and

Sirius is running towards the hole in the ice, as James' head pops back through the water. Sirius leaps into the air and dives in the small hole as James repeats the curse to make a bigger circumference of open water. They're both grinning, and it's then that Remus realises no one is dying, everyone is safe, he's just got morons for friends.

"Come on, jump in!"

"The water's nice!"

"Sod you both!" Remus calls back, pleasant tone contradicting the words.

Remus isn't one for beautiful imagery, though he has to admit he's probably better at it than Sirius. At the very least, more sincere. Still, James and Sirius look almost beautiful in the water, pink and black against the white-blue of the ice. Like elegant swimming swans or something. Of course, just as he says that Sirius bobs himself higher in the water and manages to dunk James completely under the surface, and then they're both just prats again.

Eventually they come out and James darts to the trees and passes Sirius his clothes. Remus feels the distinct urge to accio it all to teach them a lesson, but it's only rarely he acts on his compulsions and today is not the day. He clings to Sirius' sopping wet body as they go back to the house, and even in the brief moments it takes to apparate he's already cold.

"James and I are having a shower," he informs the room.

"But I-" Sirius starts.

"You're both prats, but it's my day and we're having a shower. You'll just have to use a drying charm." It's a poor substitute, Remus knows. For some reason the charm always seems to leave an oily residue. But he doesn't really give a toss at this point.

In the bathroom he watches James struggle out of the wet clothes he'd put on only a minute ago, waiting for the man to be fully nude before he began to strip himself. He makes sure to turn the water cooler than normal, even lukewarm will feel burning against James' skin. He watches as James inadvertently stretches as he climbs over the rim of the bathtub into the shower. And he watches, leaning against the cool tile, as James run a bar of green soap over his chest.

"Make you a deal?" Remus offers.

"Oh?"

"I'll lick what you soap." Remus smirks, and James circles the soap over his nipple. He follows the soap down James' ribcage, across his torso, a swipe over his hip, before finally James snaps. It's one of his favourite things about James, he's not good at waiting.

There's just something about having a cock in your mouth that feels awesome. It's why Remus is of private mind, though he'd never be stupid enough to say it aloud, that all men should be bisexual and all women straight. Lesbians really don't know what they're missing.